I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
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