what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
her facebook's as public as her vagina
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
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