i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
