I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize