new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize
