apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize