At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
