I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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