i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
