I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
