I'm really into asian looking animals
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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