Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize