i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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