Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.