She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
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