Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize