dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
