All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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