The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
