i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
