okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
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