i barfeds in our rink
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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