Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
