I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
