i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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