so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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