In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
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