I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Randomize