you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
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