Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
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