God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
