Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
