I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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