ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
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