My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
