Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
