and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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