Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
