I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Randomize
