Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
