Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Randomize
