sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Randomize
