If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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