So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
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