even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
