Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
