So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
