I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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