bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
