Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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