It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize