I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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